Baseball vs. Soccer  

Posted by The Viking in

I don't claim to be a poet... nevertheless with the World Cup approaching, I thought I would share this amusing piece I wrote in late June 2006. It was in preparation for hosting a mid-summer sodality meeting with several professional gentlemen--and myself, at my home. One of the attendees to my mid-summer soire, which included smoked pork ribs Chez Kokenge, is an Argentine and kickball--uh, I mean soccer lover.
The photo is that of Nolan Ryan, the all time strikeout king (5,714...#2 on the list has 4,875 and he is retiring) after having taken a baseball off the face. . .

It’ll be the fifth day of Juillet

and none a cent to pay

to eat, drink and be merry

no world cup talk shall I carry

the boredom! please take it away!

The drone and talk of the ‘universal’ game

really, no point scoring its just quite lame

‘The Germans will surely win the cup!’

the home turf the krauts won’t give up

Boca, River, AFA, no reason for shame

Men and boys in powder blue stripes

gave it their all, Maradona’s old yikes!

Italians, and Aussies, Poles, and Croats

Fans from all over, eating their brats

Watching for a ball between the pipes

90 minutes 3 times a day

Please kick a goal, we pray!

For heaven sakes, it’s a game

But, not a yellow or red how lame

Turn off the TV and walk away

Come to my house if you understand French

I got a grill in the back and a white painted bench

make sure you get the date right

and try with all your might

cease the talk of the sport perfect for a wench!

Where’s the barrister of the gov’ment

Sullivan come to our aid in this moment

Please all baseball lover’s unite

and give this futbol’er’ a fright

To say soccer’s glorious I’m hell bent

A man's sport requires speed

leather, pine tar, bats is what you need

or a ball up and in now that's intimidation

a deuce on the ribs, even music to the chin

could make a man a boy and take heed

Gibson, Koufax, Williams, and Ruth,

men with real guts, an example for youth

not running incessantly and kicking a ball

all that action and no scoring at all

Futboler's are actors y’all know it’s the truth

Gehrig, Maris, Hornesby even Shoeless Joe

they'd never settle for that sort of show

faking it and making it seem like a trip

and that long hair they wear is just not hip

Psst! Beckham’s really a girl I hope you know

This entry was posted on January 25, 2010 at Monday, January 25, 2010 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .


nonsense.... soccer is the only real Catholic sport! :)

January 25, 2010 at 3:33 PM

dale boca!!!!!!

January 25, 2010 at 7:06 PM

Sorry, my allegiance is still with ice hockey. BTW, Fr. Hewko would agree that hockey "is so Catholic"!

January 27, 2010 at 9:51 AM

yep... but soccer is the only sport that EVERYONE in the world plays; thus, it is very Catholic = universal!!! :)

January 27, 2010 at 5:05 PM

good point agnes

January 27, 2010 at 5:59 PM

No comment... *quietly puts on soccer cleats* =P

January 28, 2010 at 10:41 PM

Bravo Jude! Hurrah, I have made another convert! :)

January 29, 2010 at 9:46 AM

Nah, I've been playing soccer long before hockey. I'm better at hockey though.

January 30, 2010 at 10:09 PM

Either way you have to admit that this is a fun limerick. Thanks for the post Viking!

February 2, 2010 at 11:48 AM

Lol... yes. It's not quite limerick meter but the rhyme scheme works. Yay Viking!

February 2, 2010 at 4:38 PM

What's this you spake??? Baseball above soccer!?!?!?! THE WRATH OF THE DRAGON LADY SHALL DESCEND UPON YOU!!!!!!!!

Nice poem, though. :)

February 8, 2010 at 5:36 PM

By the way... it seems that the last line of verse six should be "To say baseball's glorious I'm hell-bent," if you're really glorifying baseball! Otherwise you are contradicting yourself! :)

February 12, 2010 at 2:12 PM

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